You May Be a Missionary If…
It seems a little odd to write something so frivolous so soon after my last post about losing our dear George. But life does, and has, gone on. I am glad to say the church, although still sorely missing George, is moving on, too. More and more I hear people remembering George by retelling something funny that Goerge did or said, and so laughing, instead of crying.
But really, George was a true-blue missionary at heart, someone with a light touch on this earth, so I think he would have gotten a laugh out of this list below. (I got this in a FWD from someone, and unfortuantely, don’t know the author).
And if you’ve seen the movie The Apostle, with Robert Duvall (and if not I highly recommend it…..difficult to watch, but an amazing tale of grace, in my opinion)…then you might remember the line when someone asks Duvall where he’s from. He looks at the ground, scuffs his shoe in the dust and says (as close as I can remember) “Well, you see this piece of dirt where I’m standing? Well this is where I’m from”.
George, and all of us who go by the label of “missionary” have found ourselves living out the verse that says that we are ”pilgrims and strangers on this earth”. So, as we’re just passing through, here’s some thoughts that might give you a little laugh. (I’d love to know if this is as funny to you non-missionaries as it is to those of you on the field, wherever you might be. Drop me a line!)
You may be a missionary if …
1. You can’t answer the question, “Where are you from?”
2. You read National Geographic and recognize someone.
3. You have a time zone map next to your telephone.
4. You consider a city 500 km away to be “very close”.
**5. You watch nature documentaries, and think about how good that animal would taste if it were fried.
**6. You can cut grass with a machete, but can’t start a lawnmower.
7. You speak with authority on the subject of airline travel, and all it’s added details (airport hotels, jet-lag, packing, etc.)
8. You read the international section before the comics.
9. You have friends from or in 29 different countries.
10. You sort your friends by continent.
** These are a little extreme for me! I’m not “that kind of” missionary! Are you? :)
My own additions…
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Your breakfast cereal has its ingredients list in at least 5 different languages. And you are thrilled when you find “your language” (the one you actually understand) even though its NOT your native language!
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You own numerous dictionaries, often NONE of which are for your native language.
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You find you are most comfortable speaking a strange mix of your native language with words and phrases taken from your host country’s language added in and therefore the only people that truly understand you are others from your native country living in the same host country where you are (ie. Americans in
Ukraine).
How about this: you differentiate between a toilet and a bathroom and always ask where the toilet is.
What if you watch the Oscars and recognize someone? What does that mean?